Moni is a respected athlete and sought-after performance and fat loss specialist who works with busy, active women over forty to help them lose hormonal inches and reconnect with who they really are.
There have been many times in my life when I’ve felt as though I’ve lost myself…
Having kids at thirty-eight and forty-one, the reality is, the majority of my life I spent only having to take care of one person: me. My focus was on what I was doing (playing professional volleyball), where I was going (travelling everywhere), and who I was being (trying to figure out who I was without athletics).
I’m a competitive work-horse by nature. I learned early on that failure was a part of success – you can’t have one without the other. Every time I failed, I would mourn, dust myself off, learn, and get back at it.
Then family life came, and failure took on a new meaning – it wasn’t just about me any longer.
Unconsciously I keep myself in a “safe” place. If all my thoughts, emotions, and efforts go towards my family, then we will be ok. They will be safe and happy, and so would I, right?
Wrong. In the process of feeding that control, I lost myself. My goals and dreams no longer took center stage. I didn’t know how to make myself a priority anymore in a way that didn’t make me feel guilty.
That competitive, single girl that loved a challenge, growth, and running naked free was still there but was afraid to come out. I missed my old self – like missing the university friend that used to make you belly laugh so hard that you wee a little.
Then it happened. Someone asked me the simple-yet-not-so-simple question: “what makes you happy, Moni?
I tell myself; the answer may not come overnight, but it is a first step.
Now it’s just time to get in the driver’s seat and go. The destination is not the cheesy find yourself diner, but rather the beautiful hills of Tuscany, where you truly feel connected and confident with yourself and what you are still capable of physically, mentally, and spiritually for decades to come.
And don’t worry, there will be a great bottle of wine open when you get there.
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