Sharon Sloane is an artist and a mother who has found empowerment through independence.
My life, like many, has been a series of choices pasted together. Some of these choices were intentionally made, and others less so. Starting over in my forties was terrifying. There were many days I truly wished I could just disappear. It took everything I had to find independence and create a new life for myself. So, I fought. I fought not only for my independence, but also for the life I wanted for myself and my children. The fight was both exhausting and exhilarating.
The fight began with the end of my twenty-year marriage. I used to be a stay-at-home mom on a farm, working with horses and drawing or painting every day. Having declared bankruptcy, I found myself on the opposite end of the spectrum in many ways. Thankfully with my art background, I was able to find a good job that fit my skill set. I went from painting animals and children to painting film sets. I don’t think I ever saw this being my life.
My daughter lives with me now, and my family has supported us in many ways, however, it has always felt like us against the world. We survived and have found more happiness and clarity than we have had in a long time. With my own independence came the independence of my daughter. She has grown from a young country girl taking transit for the first time to someone that organizes all aspects of her life. Thank goodness one of us has their shit together.
It’s such a mental challenge to take life one day at a time, but life becomes so incredibly overwhelming otherwise. There is an inner voice that is always there, trying to enhance the feelings of inadequacy, self-pity, and hate. Beating it back is harder some days than others. I found that being single was an emotionally positive experience for me. I was able to put myself first without guilt. I’ve found that being in a relationship and feeling alone is far worse than actually being single. I do believe that there is someone out there for me, right time, right place. I am proud to say that I’m feeling closer to the path I believe I’m meant to be on, or at least the path that will hopefully lead me to my best life with balance and happiness.
